NOVEMBER TO REMEMBER: LOVED ONES GONE, LOVED ONES HOME
23:46
Introit
“Help Lord the souls that thou has made.
The souls to thee so dear.
Imprisoned for the debts unpaid,
of sin committed here.”
The popular CHB 310 is sung especially during funerals, Christian Wakes, Service of Songs and indeed on November 2nd, All Souls Day. When we lose loved ones, the void is felt, the vacuum irreplaceable but God leads us through life’s journey, as we are kept happy and sane with the sweet memories we once shared with them while alive on one hand, and by the moments we live for each day with those around us.
Rewind to Dad…
It was the morning of Easter Tuesday, 13th April 2004; I had gone to Golden Cross hospital in Festac, Lagos to see my dad who had been to taken there on Holy Saturday night. My mum had been with him since then. It was about 9am, I told mama I wanted to visit Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament to pray for Daddy, I must have been gone for 30 minutes [I had slept off or was I meditating] when Mama came and tapped me to say Daddy was gone.
We both cried.
Fast Forward to Mama…
More than eight years after, December 29th, 2012 to be precise, I saw Mama off to the Bus Park, she was going to the village for some burials and weddings and other family engagements little did I know it would be the last of seeing her.
Fast forward again to January 21st, 2013; I was busy with some house chores; one after the other , uncles from my mother’s side started trooping into the house [you know those uncles who show up at your place only on big occasions], at first I was speculating, different permutations were going through my mind [blame it on too much Nollywood and you won’t be wrong].
It wasn’t until they had sent for my elder brother, , who came running home, took him aside, spoke with him for a few minutes and he shaking like a leaf then did I know that a loved one had gone, she (my mum) had died the previous day 20 January [when you see people who seldom cry, shed tears, then you need no further explanations].
Present Day…
It’s been twelve and three years respectively that daddy and Mama both left this world. It has not been easy to say the least and we have remembered them every passing day.
While 13th April and 20th January are dates I won’t forget , just like some other dates when dear friends, colleagues, classmates, and other family members answered the clarion call, we are yet , as members of the Church militant provided with a date when first we remember all those whose lives we try to emulate, those who have been glorified by God, who have received the Crown of Righteousness – the Church Triumphant on November 1st, and then when we Commemorate the Souls of the Faithful Departed on November 2nd.
Remembering November…
November is truly a month to remember. The thirty days it provides helps us to remember loved ones gone on the 1st and 2nd. We celebrate and observe Lung Cancer Awareness Month, Sweet Potato Awareness Month, Pulmonary Hypertension Awareness Month, Stomach Cancer Awareness Month, World Diabetes Day on the 14th, Christ the Universal King on Sunday 20nd, Thanksgiving on Fourth Thursday, 24th and “Movember”.
This is an annual event involving the growing of mustaches to raise awareness of men’s health issues – depression in men, prostate cancer and other male cancers. By encouraging large involvement in men, Movenber seeks to increase early cancer detection, diagnosis and effective treatments and ultimately reduce the number of preventable deaths.
Loved Ones Gone, Loved Ones Home – The Impact of Memory
According to The Chambers Dictionary , 10th Edition, memory is defined thus; “the power or process of retaining or reproducing mental or sensory impressions; impression so reproduced; a having or keeping in the mind; time within which past things can be remembered”.
There is a communion between the living and the dead and the nexus that binds those alive to our departed ones is the memories we once shared. The times we laughed, smiled, rejoiced, cried, sorrowed and celebrated together, yes! Those amazing moments will remain evergreen in our minds.
Hence, even if we choose to forget via the application of selective amnesia [whether induced or intentionally], November ultimately cures us of the such ailments as it provides us veritable platforms; first to ask for the intercessions of the Saints in Heaven and also to pray for the repose of the souls of the faithful departed especially the souls in purgatory, yes purgatory. I believe in the existence of a place of atonement, a cleansing place before people can enter heaven, after nothing unclean can see God.
Looking back now, I feel the impact of memory. The days Daddy scolded me, those long hours I would seat at his feet to enjoy his stories, relish of having to eat whatever is left from his plate because I served him his meal. The prodding he gave me with regards to studying well and making a good name for myself in life. For him, a good name is worth more than gold or silver.He was my first teacher in Political Science.
Mama taught me how to cook, brought out the teacher in me, she was industrious and had the Never- say- never attitude. She was very particular about education, I miss her so much because she left just when I was starting to find my bearing with writing.
From the two I learn the value of hard work, the essence of dignity and integrity and of course, the joy of contentment. I remember with nostalgia the look on her face when I brought home my Bachelors Degree and NYSC Discharge Certificate, it was divine! She felt fulfilled.
A Minute of Silence…
So too do I remember the fatherly guidance of Mr. Emmanuel Ekpo, I remember my friends, Livinus Ojimba, Anna Audu, , Rev Fr. Patrick Adegbite who baptized and gave me my first communion and personal bible, I remember my Uncle Martin Udechukwu, My Neigbour Peter Edem who loved us as children growing up in the same environment. I remember Mr. & Mrs. Esogbue, Paul and Idowu Esogbue my neighbors and other neighbors. I remember all who I have come across and who are no more and thank God for the impact they made in my life.
I thank God for the gift of November, of memory, and indeed of loved ones still home , who continually provide a support system for us to stay alive; who encourage us to hold on the memory and ideals of loved ones gone, who tell us that it is important we live full and die empty!
I am indeed grateful that I am alive this November, as it has afforded me the opportunity to remember all my loved ones gone and appreciate even more, my loved ones home. If you are reading this piece, then you are a part of my loved ones home.
Together we can make this November to Remember to relive memories of loved ones gone and store up more memories for loved ones still with us. I trust you would do so!
Reflections…
We pray for pardon and for grace To change the lives that we have led. And beg thee for their son’s dear sake To bless the living and the dead.
Eternal rest grant unto them oh Lord….
May their souls rest in peace… Amen!
OjisiEmezie
2 comments
Indeed. It's gonna be a November to remember. May their souls rest in peace. Amen.
ReplyDeleteA lovely piece. Plz accept my condolences. Indeed its a November to Remember! Eternal rest grant onto them, Oh Lord and let perpetual light shine upon them, may their souls rest in peace. Amen!
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